Made It

It's exhausting walking in 12-14 inches of snow where every step sinks. Going down was actually worse than coming back up this afternoon, slick. Roads were fine. Managed to get above freezing in town, but not at the house. I make a list, prioritize, go to the store before work, over to Kentucky for tobacco. Sharee has called about the companion student's show, so I hang that first, which requires half the day because the pieces don't have any hanging hardware, then move downstairs and do everything I can in the time remaining. We're fine, installing this show, we might be a day late, but, considering the weather, that ain't bad. I figure to carry a 20 pound pack in, for the next few days, my larder is much depleted, and I'm running short of wood. Clearly, I can correct these problems next year, get further ahead on firewood, and stock a deeper pantry. I've been here 10 years almost exactly, and, strangely, it has been my pattern, for the last three cycles, to move every 10 years; but I plan to stay here, for the next cycle, so I need to change a few things. Get ahead of the curve, refine my techniques. A dream, in which someone steals all my denim shirts (about 20, because I can wear one, aired on a hanger, three times, at least, before it goes in the basket, and that gets me through winter; at least I don't have to worry about what shirt I wear) my house burns down and I'm living under a tarp, in a tree tip-pit. This dream shakes me awake. I'm living too close to the edge. I can extend this, a few more years, maybe another decade, but it's a hard life, and requires a younger body; I'm not sure why I do it, merely habitual at this point, what you do, the fact that I have to change clothes to shave, I mean, come on. What I did today, getting down and out, accomplishing a few things, getting back home with a few supplies. I don't know many people stupid enough to do this, but I am one of them. It's stark and real to find yourself in an almost frozen house. A Grimm fairy tale. Life goes on. I had some other things to say, but I was so tired, all I wanted to do was go to bed.