Nuanced Lines

Talking with The Brit today, about directing amateur actors. He's having a difficult time with the current rehearsals for a play at the museum. If they can't learn their lines they can't begin to nuance. They can't begin to act. Fully half of being any good on stage is just learning your lines, so you can get a good mouth-feel for them. Writing pages or books is a bit different from writing for the stage, no mediation, you sound the words in your head. If you've heard me read, even if you haven't, my voice is natural; my reading voice and my prose are fairly flat, but nuanced. More effective than screaming. I'm often pithy, getting morning coffee at Market Street, this morning getting my Robust Blend and two blueberry scones which were still warm (one for me, one for the Deputy), I said to Liz, the owner, and she signaled for silence from the kitchen help, wanting to hear: -the quality of mercy is spared when I can have a warm blueberry scone- and she curtsied. I thought, right there in the moment, tripping over my own feet, that it was cool, that I could say whatever I wanted, and someone could either respond or not. I like Liz, I like Jim at the pub, I like a lot of people, but I don't want to spend any time with them. An exception looms, one of my oldest and dearest friends, Dr. Diana, she of the amazing hair and swirling skirts. Brilliant, informed, one of the few people to visit everywhere I've ever lived. This is a treat, I think, then look around, at my winter survival hovel. She calls, I'm a little anxious. One reason I can live the way I do is that I don't have to consider another person, other, there is no compromise, no need for one. But if someone visits, then you have to consider other. Creature comforts, that kind of thing, outhouse, no running water. On the other hand, I'm a good cook, and it's usually warm near the stove. This house is too large for me now, I needed space for my daughters and a lover then, but I don't now, need a smaller house, easier to heat. B and I have talked about this so many times, I might just build that organic house, to grow old in, and rent this place out. My sense of attachment is different now, I used to think everything was connected, now I'm not so sure. There are splits and checks I can't explain, they happened on my watch, and I accept responsibility. Guilty as charged. I just wish I knew what caused them. I've looked at this closely, January, Janus, I look at things closely, it's my nature.