The List

Right now, I'm doing three things, but I seem to be on track. I had made a second or third list and took off work an hour early, so I could get up to speed. An hour and a half to throw the stew together, because I insist that the cubed London Broil, shaken in a bag with spices, be browned before inclusion, the fond de-glazed with wine; and I roasted a turnip and a parsnip, knowing they would break down in the juice, adding complexity. I'm heating the gallon or so, to boiling, then simmer for a couple of hours, simmer again tomorrow night, should be ready for Friday. Boiled water and pasteurizing the sauce, cleaning the jars; I added several marinades, and, as it had gotten fairly hot, tempered it with fruit juice, papaya, and added some tamarind paste. The kitchen sink was disgusting, after cleaning jars, so I clean that, vacuum some dust bunnies. Tomorrow, I note, I must clean flat surfaces, there is no place to eat; I start tonight, by gathering several piles that need sent to people. I need to shelve 30 or 40 books, and find a place to stack off-prints. Hope I get my quantities correct, cooking for this many people. Talk about winging it, I make it up as I go along. Soups and stews are better if they're eaten a day or two after they're made. I think about making a Butternut Squash soup, and maybe a dessert, it's always good to shock, if, you know, it's not too inconvenient. I'm in a cooking mode, damn the torpedoes. One of my curses is that I'm southern and I want to feed you, cheese grits, egg in a hole, something: I'm always worried you haven't eaten. You look thin. The house smells great, the simmering stew, the sauce, I sample them, as time goes on, god should grant we eat this well. Still, I'm worried I don't hear exactly what's said. Are you thinking about me or you? I have flat surfaces to deal with, and bills to pay. Aralee was correct, when she talked about entitlement. What was expected. Neither here nor there. I just want conversation. Decent conversation. I've given up almost everything, at least we could talk.