Gone Wanky

My left hip pains me when the weather is cold and humid. I was burrowed in my down sleeping bag, on top of the bed upstairs, dreaming about the winter beaches of Cape Cod. I needed to pee, so I unzipped, sat up, swung around, found my house slippers. Beyond a certain point nothing is easy. I have to sit down, on the top step, and consider my options. Railings are mostly psychological. You touch them to chart a passage. Sometimes you use them, to navigate. My hip was hurting and I was being very careful. I had to stop, several times, on the way outdoors. Older, and failing. The back deck was iced-over, footing was suspect, and I relied on an old mop-handle to keep my balance, but it was worth the risk. Cold and brisk. Sound carries in a different way, everything is harmonics. Ronnie tuning his guitar. I was sitting in the front row, once, when the Boston Symphony Orchestra was rehearsing; I was the entire audience. Before they launched into Berlioz, they were tuning, and it was the most beautiful sound in the world. I've always liked rehearsals better than performances because the dancers are always in tattered tights and there's usually a great deal of profanity. The real world. I'd slept late, because I was up most of there night, wondering whether or not I needed a couple of commas, which can become an issue, if you live alone, and don't speak for several days. B came over, I heard his trill, like calling a coon dog to bay, made us a cup of coffee, and he wondered if there was anything he could do. I mentioned the stove-pipe, and he said he'd be over tomorrow morning; he's fearless, and I can't climb a ladder anymore, without worrying about my sense of balance. Winter, Alan said, was perfect, because you didn't have to make anything up, it was all black or white. Snow and stick trees. There's more than that, certainly, but it is the basic framework. The natural world. Glenn called and we talked about that. It's easy enough to see the connection. What exists in the real world and our connection. Nothing succeeds like success. B had some questions about how the roof- load was carried, and I have a gift for visualizing; I don't know where it came from; but if I look at a problem long enough, I can usually find a solution. Actually, I run through a number of solutions that are more or less elegant, and I look at the materials on hand. Fact is that I visualize things. I can't not. Seeing and believing. He agrees to clean my stovepipe if I'll look at the question of his roof. A fair exchange.